哈利·波特与死亡圣器 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 英文  中文  双语对照  双语交替 首页  目录  上一章   下一章

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CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE THE PRINCE’S TALE

第三十三章　“王子”的故事

Harry remained kneeling at Snape’s side, simply staring down at him, until quite suddenly a high, cold voice spoke so close to them that Harry jumped to his feet, the flask gripped tightly in his hands, thinking that Voldemort had reentered the room.

哈利久久地跪在斯内普身边，呆呆地凝望着他。突然，一个似乎近在咫尺的高亢、冷酷的声音开始说话了，哈利惊跳起来，手里紧紧攥着瓶子，以为伏地魔又返回了屋里。

Voldemort’s voice reverberated from the walls and floor, and Harry realized that he was talking to Hogwarts and to all the surrounding area, that the residents of Hogsmeade and all those still fighting in the castle would hear him as clearly as if he stood beside them, his breath on the back of their necks, a deathblow away.

伏地魔的声音在墙壁和地板间回响，哈利这才意识到他是在对霍格沃茨及周围的所有地区说话。霍格莫德村的居民和城堡里仍在战斗的人们都能清楚地听见他的声音，如同他就站在他们身边，他的呼吸就喷在他们脖子后面，他一出手就能让他们毙命。

“You have fought,” said the high, cold voice, “valiantly. Lord Voldemort knows how to value bravery.

“你们进行了勇敢的抵抗，”那个高亢、冷酷的声音说，“伏地魔大人知道如何欣赏勇气。”

“Yet you have sustained heavy losses. If you continue to resist me, you will all die, one by one. I do not wish this to happen. Every drop of magical blood spilled is a loss and a waste.

“但是你们蒙受了沉重的损失。如果继续抵抗，你们一个接一个都会死去。我不希望发生这样的事情。巫师的血，每流一滴都是一种损失和浪费。”

“Lord Voldemort is merciful. I command my forces to retreat immediately.

“伏地魔大人是仁慈的。我命令我的队伍撤退，立即撤退。”

“You have one hour. Dispose of your dead with dignity. Treat your injured.

“给你们一个小时，体面地安置死者，治疗伤员。”

“I speak now, Harry Potter, directly to you. You have permitted your friends to die for you rather than face me yourself. I shall wait for one hour in the Forbidden Forest. If, at the end of that hour, you have not come to me, have not given yourself up, then battle recommences. This time, I shall enter the fray myself, Harry Potter, and I shall find you, and I shall punish every last man, woman, and child who has tried to conceal you from me. One hour.”

“哈利·波特，现在我直接对你说话。你听任你的朋友为你赴死，而不是挺身出来面对我。我将在禁林里等候一个小时。如果一小时后你没有来找我，没有主动投降，那么战斗还将继续。这次我将亲自上阵，哈利·波特，我将找到你，我将惩罚每一个试图窝藏你的男人、女人和孩子，一个也不放过。一个小时。”

Both Ron and Hermione shook their heads frantically, looking at Harry.

罗恩和赫敏都看着哈利拼命摇头。

“Don’t listen to him,” said Ron.

“别听他的。”罗恩说。

“It’ll be all right,” said Hermione wildly. “Let’s — let’s get back to the castle, if he’s gone to the forest we’ll need to think of a new plan —”

“没关系的，”赫敏激动地说，“我们——我们回城堡去吧。如果他去了禁林，我们需要重要新考虑一个计划——”

She glanced at Snape’s body, then hurried back to the tunnel entrance. Ron followed her. Harry gathered up the Invisibility Cloak, then looked down at Snape. He did not know what to feel, except shock at the way Snape had been killed, and the reason for which it had been done. . . .

她扫了一眼斯内普的尸体，便匆匆朝隧道入口走去，罗恩也跟了过来。哈利收起隐形衣，又低头看着斯内普。他说不清内心的感受，只是为斯内普的这种死法，以及他丧命的原因感到震惊……

They crawled back through the tunnel, none of them talking, and Harry wondered whether Ron and Hermione could still hear Voldemort ringing in their heads, as he could.

他们在隧道里往外爬，谁也没有说话，哈利不知道罗恩和赫敏是不是也像他一样，脑子里仍然回响着伏地魔的声音。

You have permitted your friends to die for you rather than face me yourself. I shall wait for one hour in the Forbidden Forest. . . . One hour. . . .

你听任你的朋友为你赴死，而不是挺身出来面对我。我将在禁林里等候一个小时……一个小时……

Small bundles seemed to litter the lawn at the front of the castle. It could only be an hour or so from dawn, yet it was pitch-black. The three of them hurried toward the stone steps. A lone clog, the size of a small boat, lay abandoned in front of them. There was no other sign of Grawp or of his attacker.

城堡前的草地上散落着一个个小包裹似的东西。离天亮大约只有一小时了，四下里还是漆黑一片。他们三个急急忙忙跑向石阶。一根小船那么大的长木头横在他们面前，格洛普和刚才袭击他的那个巨人都不见了踪影。

The castle was unnaturally silent. There were no flashes of light now, no bangs or screams or shouts. The flagstones of the deserted entrance hall were stained with blood. Emeralds were still scattered all over the floor, along with pieces of marble and splintered wood. Part of the banisters had been blown away.

城堡里异常寂静，此刻既看不见亮光闪烁，也听不见撞击声、尖叫声和呐喊声。空无一人的门厅里，石板上血迹斑斑，绿宝石仍然散落在地，还有破碎的大理石和劈裂的木头；一部分扶栏被炸飞了。

“Where is everyone?” whispered Hermione.

“人都到哪儿去了？”赫敏轻声说。

Ron led the way to the Great Hall. Harry stopped in the doorway.

罗恩领头朝大礼堂走去。哈利在门口停住了。

The House tables were gone and the room was crowded. The survivors stood in groups, their arms around each other’s necks. The injured were being treated upon the raised platform by Madam Pomfrey and a group of helpers. Firenze was amongst the injured; his flank poured blood and he shook where he lay, unable to stand.

学院桌子不见了，礼堂里挤满了人。幸存者三五成群地站着，互相搂抱在一起。伤员都集中在高台上，庞弗雷夫人和一群助手在给他们治疗。费伦泽也受伤了，他的一侧身体大量出血，已经站立不住，躺在那里瑟瑟发抖。

The dead lay in a row in the middle of the Hall. Harry could not see Fred’s body, because his family surrounded him. George was kneeling at his head; Mrs. Weasley was lying across Fred’s chest, her body shaking, Mr. Weasley stroking her hair while tears cascaded down his cheeks.

死者在礼堂中央躺成一排。哈利看不见弗雷德的遗体，因为他的家人把他团团围住了。乔治跪在弗雷德脑袋边，韦斯莱夫人浑身颤抖地伏在弗雷德胸上，韦斯莱先生抚摸着她的头发，泪流满面。

Without a word to Harry, Ron and Hermione walked away. Harry saw Hermione approach Ginny, whose face was swollen and blotchy, and hug her. Ron joined Bill, Fleur, and Percy, who flung an arm around Ron’s shoulders. As Ginny and Hermione moved closer to the rest of the family, Harry had a clear view of the bodies lying next to Fred: Remus and Tonks, pale and still and peaceful-looking, apparently asleep beneath the dark, enchanted ceiling.

罗恩和赫敏没有对哈利说一句话就走开了。哈利看见赫敏走到金妮面前抱了抱她，金妮的脸肿着，满是污垢。罗恩走到比尔、芙蓉和珀西身边，珀西搂住了罗恩的肩膀。就在金妮和赫敏靠近家里其他人时，哈利看清了躺在弗雷德身边的两具遗体：莱姆斯和唐克斯，脸色苍白，一动不动，但看上去很宁静，似乎在施了魔法的漆黑的天花板下安详地睡着了。

The Great Hall seemed to fly away, become smaller, shrink, as Harry reeled backward from the doorway. He could not draw breath. He could not bear to look at any of the other bodies, to see who else had died for him. He could not bear to join the Weasleys, could not look into their eyes, when if he had given himself up in the first place, Fred might never have died. . . .

哈利踉踉跄跄地后退着离开门口，礼堂似乎在飞去，越缩越小。他透不过气来。他没有勇气再去看其他遗体，再去弄清还有谁为他而死。他不敢去见韦斯莱一家，不敢看他们的眼睛，如果他一开始就主动投降，弗雷德也许就不会死……

He turned away and ran up the marble staircase. Lupin, Tonks . . . He yearned not to feel. . . . He wished he could rip out his heart, his innards, everything that was screaming inside him. . . .

他转身顺着大理石楼梯往上跑。卢平、唐克斯……他多么希望自己没有感觉……多么希望能把他的心、他的五脏六腑都扯出来，这些东西都在他的体内尖叫……

The castle was completely empty; even the ghosts seemed to have joined the mass mourning in the Great Hall. Harry ran without stopping, clutching the crystal flask of Snape’s last thoughts, and he did not slow down until he reached the stone gargoyle guarding the headmaster’s office.

城堡里空无一人，就连幽灵似乎也加入了礼堂里哀悼的人群。哈利不停地往前跑，手里紧紧攥着装满斯内普最后思想的水晶瓶，一直跑到校长办公室外的石兽跟前才放慢了脚步。

“Password?”

“口令？”

“Dumbledore!” said Harry without thinking, because it was he whom he yearned to see, and to his surprise the gargoyle slid aside, revealing the spiral staircase behind.

“邓布利多！”哈利不假思索地喊道，因为他最想见的人就是邓布利多。令他吃惊的是，石兽竟然滑到一边，露出了后面的螺旋楼梯。

But when Harry burst into the circular office he found a change. The portraits that hung all around the walls were empty. Not a single headmaster or headmistress remained to see him; all, it seemed, had flitted away, charging through the paintings that lined the castle, so that they could have a clear view of what was going on.

哈利冲进圆形办公室，发现这里已经有了变化。墙上挂的肖像都空了。那些男女校长没有一个留在这里。他们似乎都逃走了，顺着城堡墙壁上排列的图画冲到了前面，想看清事态的发展。

Harry glanced hopelessly at Dumbledore’s deserted frame, which hung directly behind the headmaster’s chair, then turned his back on it. The stone Pensieve lay in the cabinet where it had always been: Harry heaved it onto the desk and poured Snape’s memories into the wide basin with its runic markings around the edge. To escape into someone else’s head would be a blessed relief. . . . Nothing that even Snape had left him could be worse than his own thoughts. The memories swirled, silver white and strange, and without hesitating, with a feeling of reckless abandonment, as though this would assuage his torturing grief, Harry dived.

哈利绝望地看了一眼挂在校长座椅后面的邓布利多的空肖像框，然后转过身来。石头冥想盆还和往常一样放在柜子里。哈利把盆口刻有如尼文符号的大石盆搬到桌子上，将斯内普的记忆倒了进去。逃到别人的思想里去也是一种解脱……即使是斯内普留给他的东西，也不可能比他自己的思绪更糟。记忆在旋转，银白色，形状奇异，哈利不再迟疑，抱着一种不管不顾、彻底放弃的心理，一头扎了进去，似乎这能缓解他内心刀割般的痛苦。

He fell headlong into sunlight, and his feet found warm ground. When he straightened up, he saw that he was in a nearly deserted playground. A single huge chimney dominated the distant skyline. Two girls were swinging backward and forward, and a skinny boy was watching them from behind a clump of bushes. His black hair was overlong and his clothes were so mismatched that it looked deliberate: too short jeans, a shabby, overlarge coat that might have belonged to a grown man, an odd smocklike shirt.

他头朝前落进了阳光里，双脚踏在温暖的土地上。他直起身子，发现自己是在一个几乎没有人的游乐场上。一个大大的烟囱赫然耸立在远处的天际。两个女孩在荡秋千，一个瘦瘦的男孩躲在灌木丛后面注视着她们。男孩的黑头发很长，身上的衣服极不协调，倒像是故意穿成这个样子：一条过短的牛仔裤，一件又大又长、像是大人穿的破旧外衣，还有一件怪模怪样的孕妇服似的衬衫。

Harry moved closer to the boy. Snape looked no more than nine or ten years old, sallow, small, stringy. There was undisguised greed in his thin face as he watched the younger of the two girls swinging higher and higher than her sister.

哈利走近男孩身边。斯内普看上去约莫九到十岁，脸色灰黄，个头矮小，体格精瘦。注视着较小的那个女孩在秋千上比那个大的越荡越高，他瘦瘦的脸上露出了不加掩饰的渴慕。

“Lily, don’t do it!” shrieked the elder of the two.

“莉莉，别这样！”较大的女孩尖叫道。

But the girl had let go of the swing at the very height of its arc and flown into the air, quite literally flown, launched herself skyward with a great shout of laughter, and instead of crumpling on the playground asphalt, she soared like a trapeze artist through the air, staying up far too long, landing far too lightly.

可是，小女孩在秋千荡到最高处时松开手飞到空中，真的是在飞，欢声大笑着扑向天空。她并没有重重地摔在游戏场的柏油地上，而是像杂技演员一样在空中滑翔，停留了很长时间，最后十分轻盈地落在地上。

“Mummy told you not to!”

“妈妈叫你别这么做！”

Petunia stopped her swing by dragging the heels of her sandals on the ground, making a crunching, grinding sound, then leapt up, hands on hips.

佩妮让鞋跟擦地停住秋千，发出尖厉刺耳的摩擦声，然后她又跳了起来，双手叉腰。

“Mummy said you weren’t allowed, Lily!”

“妈妈说不许你这样，莉莉！”

“But I’m fine,” said Lily, still giggling. “Tuney, look at this. Watch what I can do.”

“可是我没事儿，”莉莉说，还在咯咯笑着，“佩妮，看看这个。看我的本事。”

Petunia glanced around. The playground was deserted apart from themselves and, though the girls did not know it, Snape. Lily had picked up a fallen flower from the bush behind which Snape lurked. Petunia advanced, evidently torn between curiosity and disapproval. Lily waited until Petunia was near enough to have a clear view, then held out her palm. The flower sat there, opening and closing its petals, like some bizarre, many-lipped oyster.

佩妮看了看四周，空荡荡的游戏场里只有她们两人，当然还有斯内普，不过女孩们并不知道。莉莉从斯内普藏身的灌木丛里捡起一朵枯落的花。佩妮走了上来，看上去既好奇又不满，内心十分矛盾。莉莉等佩妮走近可以看清了，就把手摊开来，花瓣在她手心里不停地一开一合，就像某种古怪的、多层的牡蛎。

“Stop it!” shrieked Petunia.

“别这样！”佩妮尖叫道。

“It’s not hurting you,” said Lily, but she closed her hand on the blossom and threw it back to the ground.

“我又没把你怎么样。”莉莉说，不过她还是把花捏成一团扔到了地上。

“It’s not right,” said Petunia, but her eyes had followed the flower’s flight to the ground and lingered upon it. “How do you do it?” she added, and there was definite longing in her voice.

“这不对，”佩妮说道，但她的目光追随着落地的花，并久久地停在上面，“你是怎么做的？”她又问，声音里透着掩饰不住的渴望。

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?” Snape could no longer contain himself, but had jumped out from behind the bushes. Petunia shrieked and ran backward toward the swings, but Lily, though clearly startled, remained where she was. Snape seemed to regret his appearance. A dull flush of color mounted the sallow cheeks as he looked at Lily.

“这不是很清楚的事吗？”斯内普再也克制不住，从灌木丛后面跳了出来。佩妮尖叫一声，转身朝秋千跑去，莉莉显然也吓了一跳，但待在原地没动。斯内普似乎后悔自己贸然出现，他看着莉莉，灰黄的面颊上泛起淡淡的红晕。

“What’s obvious?” asked Lily.

“什么很清楚？”莉莉问。

Snape had an air of nervous excitement. With a glance at the distant Petunia, now hovering beside the swings, he lowered his voice and said, “I know what you are.”

斯内普显得又紧张又激动。他看看远处在秋千旁徘徊的佩妮，压低了声音说道：“我知道你是什么人。”

“What do you mean?”

“什么意思？”

“You’re . . . you’re a witch,” whispered Snape.

“你是……你是个女巫。”斯内普轻声说。

She looked affronted.

莉莉像是受了侮辱。

“That’s not a very nice thing to say to somebody!”

“对别人说这种话是很不礼貌的！”

She turned, nose in the air, and marched off toward her sister.

她转过身，仰着脸大步朝她姐姐走去。

“No!” said Snape. He was highly colored now, and Harry wondered why he did not take off the ridiculously large coat, unless it was because he did not want to reveal the smock beneath it. He flapped after the girls, looking ludicrously batlike, like his older self.

“不！”斯内普说。他的脸已经变得通红，哈利不明白他为什么不脱掉那件可笑的超大外衣，除非是因为他不想露出下面的孕妇服。他甩着袖子去追两个女孩，那滑稽的模样活像蝙蝠，活像他成年后的样子。

The sisters considered him, united in disapproval, both holding on to one of the swing poles as though it was the safe place in tag.

姐妹俩以同样不满的目光审视着他，两人都抓着一根秋千柱子，好像那是捉人游戏中的安全地带。

“You are,” said Snape to Lily. “You are a witch. I’ve been watching you for a while. But there’s nothing wrong with that. My mum’s one, and I’m a wizard.”

“你就是，”斯内普对莉莉说，“你就是个女巫。我观察你有一阵子了。这没有什么不好的。我妈妈就是女巫，我是男巫。”

Petunia’s laugh was like cold water.

佩妮的笑声像冷水一样。

“Wizard!” she shrieked, her courage returned now that she had recovered from the shock of his unexpected appearance. “I know who you are. You’re that Snape boy! They live down Spinner’s End by the river,” she told Lily, and it was evident from her tone that she considered the address a poor recommendation. “Why have you been spying on us?”

“男巫！”她尖叫一声。刚才这男孩的突然出现使她受惊不小，现在她恢复了镇静，勇气又回来了。“我知道你是谁。你是斯内普家的那个小男孩！他们住在河边的蜘蛛尾巷，”她告诉莉莉，语气明显表示她认为那是个下三滥的地方，“你为什么要偷看我们？”

“Haven’t been spying,” said Snape, hot and uncomfortable and dirty-haired in the bright sunlight. “Wouldn’t spy on you, anyway,” he added spitefully, “you’re a Muggle.”

“我没有偷看，”斯内普说，他又激动又不安，在明亮的阳光下头发显得很脏，“才不愿意偷看你呢，”他轻蔑地接着说，“你是个麻瓜。”

Though Petunia evidently did not understand the word, she could hardly mistake the tone.

佩妮显然不明白这个词的意思，但她绝不会听不懂他的语气。

“Lily, come on, we’re leaving!” she said shrilly. Lily obeyed her sister at once, glaring at Snape as she left. He stood watching them as they marched through the playground gate, and Harry, the only one left to observe him, recognized Snape’s bitter disappointment, and understood that Snape had been planning this moment for a while, and that it had all gone wrong. . . .

“莉莉，快，我们走吧！”她尖声说。莉莉立刻听从姐姐的话动身离开了，但眼睛还瞪着斯内普。

The scene dissolved, and before Harry knew it, re-formed around him. He was now in a small thicket of trees. He could see a sunlit river glittering through their trunks. The shadows cast by the trees made a basin of cool green shade. Two children sat facing each other, cross-legged on the ground. Snape had removed his coat now; his odd smock looked less peculiar in the half light.

斯内普站在那里注视着她俩大步穿过游戏场的门，此刻只有哈利在一旁看着他。哈利看出了斯内普内心的痛苦和失望，他明白斯内普筹划这一刻有一段时间了，没想到一切都乱了套……

“. . . and the Ministry can punish you if you do magic outside school, you get letters.”

眼前的情景消失了，没等哈利反应过来，周围完全变了样儿。

“But I have done magic outside school!”

他现在是在一片小树林里。他看见一条阳光下的小河在树丛间流过，波光粼粼，树荫洒下一片墨绿色的清凉。两个孩子盘着腿，面对面地坐在地上。斯内普已经脱去了外衣，在半明半暗的光线里，那件古怪的孕妇服显得不那么刺眼了。

“We’re all right. We haven’t got wands yet. They let you off when you’re a kid and you can’t help it. But once you’re eleven,” he nodded importantly, “and they start training you, then you’ve got to go careful.”

“……如果你在校外施魔法，魔法部就会惩罚你，你会收到信的。”

There was a little silence. Lily had picked up a fallen twig and twirled it in the air, and Harry knew that she was imagining sparks trailing from it. Then she dropped the twig, leaned in toward the boy, and said, “It is real, isn’t it? It’s not a joke? Petunia says you’re lying to me. Petunia says there isn’t a Hogwarts. It is real, isn’t it?”

“可是我在校外施过魔法呀！”

“It’s real for us,” said Snape. “Not for her. But we’ll get the letter, you and me.”

“我们没关系。我们还没有魔杖呢。小孩子控制不住自己，他们不管。一旦到了十一岁，”他煞有介事地点点头，“他们开始训练你，那时你就得小心点儿了。”

“Really?” whispered Lily.

两人沉默了一会儿。莉莉捡起地上的一根树枝，在空中快速地旋转，哈利知道她在想象树枝后面飘出火星。然后她扔掉树枝，冲着男孩探身说道：“这是真的，对吗？不是开玩笑？佩妮说你在骗我。佩妮说根本没有什么霍格沃茨。这是真的，对吗？”

“Definitely,” said Snape, and even with his poorly cut hair and his odd clothes, he struck an oddly impressive figure sprawled in front of her, brimful of confidence in his destiny.

“对我们来说是真的，”斯内普说，“对她来说不是。我们会收到信的，你和我。”

“And will it really come by owl?” Lily whispered.

“真的？”莉莉轻声问。

“Normally,” said Snape. “But you’re Muggle-born, so someone from the school will have to come and explain to your parents.”

“千真万确。”斯内普说，他虽然头发参差不齐，衣服稀奇古怪，但坐在她面前却显得别有一番气派，对自己的前途充满信心。

“Does it make a difference, being Muggle-born?”

“信真的是由猫头鹰送来？”莉莉小声问。

Snape hesitated. His black eyes, eager in the greenish gloom, moved over the pale face, the dark red hair.

“一般来说是这样，”斯内普说，“但你是麻瓜出身，所以学校会派人来向你父母解释一下。”

“No,” he said. “It doesn’t make any difference.”

“麻瓜出身会有什么不同吗？”

“Good,” said Lily, relaxing: It was clear that she had been worrying.

斯内普迟疑着，他的黑眼睛在绿荫下显得很热切，看着莉莉那张苍白的脸和那头深红色的头发。

“You’ve got loads of magic,” said Snape. “I saw that. All the time I was watching you . . .”

“不会，”他说，“不会有什么不同。”

His voice trailed away; she was not listening, but had stretched out on the leafy ground and was looking up at the canopy of leaves overhead. He watched her as greedily as he had watched her in the playground.

“太好了。”莉莉说，松了口气。显得她一直在为此担心。

“How are things at your house?” Lily asked.

“你会变许多魔法，”斯内普说，“我看见了。我一直在偷看你……”他的声音越来越轻。莉莉没有听他说，而是四肢伸开躺在铺满绿叶的地上，望着头顶茂密的树叶。斯内普渴慕地望着她，就像游戏场上望着她时一样。

A little crease appeared between his eyes.

“你家里的事情怎么样啦？”莉莉问。

“Fine,” he said.

斯内普微微蹙起了眉头。

“They’re not arguing anymore?”

“还好。”他说。

“Oh yes, they’re arguing,” said Snape. He picked up a fistful of leaves and began tearing them apart, apparently unaware of what he was doing. “But it won’t be that long and I’ll be gone.”

“他们不吵了？”

“Doesn’t your dad like magic?”

“噢，还吵，”斯内普说，一边抓起一把叶子，把它们撕碎了，但显然并没有意识到自己在做什么，“但不会太久了，我就要走了。”

“He doesn’t like anything, much,” said Snape.

“你爸爸不喜欢魔法？”

“Severus?”

“他什么都不太喜欢。”斯内普说。

A little smile twisted Snape’s mouth when she said his name.

“西弗勒斯？”

“Yeah?”

听到她叫自己的名字，斯内普的嘴角掠过一丝笑意。

“Tell me about the dementors again.”

“嗯？”

“What d’you want to know about them for?”

“再跟我说说摄魂怪的事。”

“If I use magic outside school —”

“你打听它们干什么？”

“They wouldn’t give you to the dementors for that! Dementors are for people who do really bad stuff. They guard the wizard prison, Azkaban. You’re not going to end up in Azkaban, you’re too —”

“如果我在校外使用魔法——”

He turned red again and shredded more leaves. Then a small rustling noise behind Harry made him turn: Petunia, hiding behind a tree, had lost her footing.

“不会为了这个把你交给摄魂怪的！摄魂怪是专门对付那些真正干了坏事的人。它们看守巫师监狱——阿兹卡班。你不会进阿兹卡班的，你太——”

“Tuney!” said Lily, surprise and welcome in her voice, but Snape had jumped to his feet.

他的脸又红了，撕碎了更多的树叶。就在这时，哈利身后传来沙沙的声音，他转身一看，佩妮躺在一棵树后，脚下没有站稳。

“Who’s spying now?” he shouted. “What d’you want?”

“佩妮！”莉莉说，声音里透着惊讶和欢迎，可是斯内普跳了起来。

Petunia was breathless, alarmed at being caught. Harry could see her struggling for something hurtful to say.

“现在是谁在偷看？”他嚷道，“你想干吗？”

“What is that you’re wearing, anyway?” she said, pointing at Snape’s chest. “Your mum’s blouse?”

佩妮被发现后惊慌失措，几乎喘不过气来。哈利看出她在绞尽脑汁想说几句伤人的话。

There was a crack: A branch over Petunia’s head had fallen. Lily screamed: The branch caught Petunia on the shoulder, and she staggered backward and burst into tears.

“你倒说说你穿的那是什么？”她指着斯内普的胸口，“你妈妈的衣服？”

“Tuney!”

咔嚓一声，佩妮头顶上一根树枝突然落了下来。莉莉尖叫一声，树枝砸中了佩妮的肩膀，她踉跄着后退几步，哭了起来。

But Petunia was running away. Lily rounded on Snape.

“佩妮！”

“Did you make that happen?”

可是佩妮跑开了。莉莉朝斯内普发火了。

“No.” He looked both defiant and scared.

“是你干的吗？”

“You did!” She was backing away from him. “You did ! You hurt her!”

“不是。”斯内普显得既不服又害怕。

“No — no I didn’t!”

“就是你！”莉莉从他面前后退，“就是你！你伤着她了！”

But the lie did not convince Lily: After one last burning look, she ran from the little thicket, off after her sister, and Snape looked miserable and confused. . . .

“不——我没有！”

And the scene re-formed. Harry looked around: He was on platform nine and three-quarters, and Snape stood beside him, slightly hunched, next to a thin, sallow-faced, sour-looking woman who greatly resembled him. Snape was staring at a family of four a short distance away. The two girls stood a little apart from their parents. Lily seemed to be pleading with her sister; Harry moved closer to listen.

然而莉莉不相信他的谎话。她气冲冲地看了他最后一眼，就跑出小树林，追她姐姐去了，斯内普显得痛苦而困惑……

“. . . I’m sorry, Tuney, I’m sorry! Listen —” She caught her sister’s hand and held tight to it, even though Petunia tried to pull it away. “Maybe once I’m there — no, listen, Tuney! Maybe once I’m there, I’ll be able to go to Professor Dumbledore and persuade him to change his mind!”

场景转换。哈利环顾四周，他是在9又3/4站台上，斯内普站在他旁边，微微弓着身子，紧挨着一个跟他长得很像的脸色灰黄、神情阴沉的瘦女人。斯内普正盯着不远处的一家四口。两个女孩离开她们的父母站着。莉莉似乎在央求她的姐姐。哈利凑过去听。

“I don’t — want — to — go!” said Petunia, and she dragged her hand back out of her sister’s grasp. “You think I want to go to some stupid castle and learn to be a — a —”

“……我很难过，佩妮，我很难过！你听我说——”她抓过姐姐的手紧紧地握住，佩妮则拼命想挣扎，“也许我一到那儿——不，听我说，佩妮！也许我一到那儿，就能找到邓布利多教授，说服他改变主意！”

Her pale eyes roved over the platform, over the cats mewling in their owners’ arms, over the owls fluttering and hooting at each other in cages, over the students, some already in their long black robes, loading trunks onto the scarlet steam engine or else greeting one another with glad cries after a summer apart.

“我才——不想——去呢！”佩妮说，使劲想把手从妹妹手里抽出来，“你以为我愿意到某个荒唐的城堡里去，学着做一个——一个——”

“— you think I want to be a — a freak?”

她浅色的眼睛望着站台，望着猫在主人怀里喵喵地叫，望着猫头鹰在笼子里扑打翅膀，互相高叫，望着那些学生——有的已穿上黑色的长袍，他们在把行李搬上鲜红色的蒸汽机车，在分别一个暑假后高兴地大声与同学打着招呼。

Lily’s eyes filled with tears as Petunia succeeded in tugging her hand away.

“——你以为我想成为一个——一个怪物？”

“I’m not a freak,” said Lily. “That’s a horrible thing to say.”

佩妮终于把手抽走了，莉莉眼睛里满是泪水。

“That’s where you’re going,” said Petunia with relish. “A special school for freaks. You and that Snape boy . . . weirdos, that’s what you two are. It’s good you’re being separated from normal people. It’s for our safety.”

“我不是怪物，”莉莉说，“这么说真难听。”

Lily glanced toward her parents, who were looking around the platform with an air of wholehearted enjoyment, drinking in the scene. Then she looked back at her sister, and her voice was low and fierce.

“那就是你要去的地方，”佩妮来劲地说道，“一个专门给怪物办的学校。你和那个姓斯内普的男孩……怪胎，你们俩都是怪胎。幸好把你们跟普通人隔开了，那是为了我们的安全。”

“You didn’t think it was such a freak’s school when you wrote to the headmaster and begged him to take you.”

莉莉朝父母那边瞟了一眼，他们正带着由衷的喜悦看着站台上的情景，心情的饱览这一幕。莉莉又回过头来看着姐姐，压低声音，语气变得很激烈。

Petunia turned scarlet.

“你给校长写信求他收下你时，可没认为这是一所怪物学校。”

“Beg? I didn’t beg!”

佩妮的脸变得通红。

“I saw his reply. It was very kind.”

“求？我没求！”

“You shouldn’t have read —” whispered Petunia, “that was my private — how could you — ?”

“我看见他的回信了，写得很委婉。”

Lily gave herself away by half-glancing toward where Snape stood nearby. Petunia gasped.

“你不应该偷看——”佩妮轻声说，“那是我的隐私——你怎么可以——”

“That boy found it! You and that boy have been sneaking in my room!”

莉莉朝站在近旁的斯内普瞥了一眼，泄漏了秘密。佩妮倒抽了一口冷气。

“No — not sneaking —” Now Lily was on the defensive. “Severus saw the envelope, and he couldn’t believe a Muggle could have contacted Hogwarts, that’s all! He says there must be wizards working undercover in the postal service who take care of —”

“那个男孩发现的！你和那个男孩偷偷溜进了我们房间！”

“Apparently wizards poke their noses in everywhere!” said Petunia, now as pale as she had been flushed. “Freak!” she spat at her sister, and she flounced off to where her parents stood. . . .

“不是——不是偷偷溜进去——”现在是莉莉在辩解了，“西弗勒斯看见了一信封，他不相信麻瓜也能跟霍格沃茨取得联系，就是这样！他说肯定有巫师潜入了邮政系统，秘密地关照——”

The scene dissolved again. Snape was hurrying along the corridor of the Hogwarts Express as it clattered through the countryside. He had already changed into his school robes, had perhaps taken the first opportunity to take off his dreadful Muggle clothes. At last he stopped, outside a compartment in which a group of rowdy boys were talking. Hunched in a corner seat beside the window was Lily, her face pressed against the windowpane.

“看来巫师到处乱管闲事！”佩妮说道，刚才通红的脸现在变得煞白，“怪物！”她朝妹妹啐了一口，猛一转身，向父母跑去……

Snape slid open the compartment door and sat down opposite Lily. She glanced at him and then looked back out of the window. She had been crying.

场景又消失了。

“I don’t want to talk to you,” she said in a constricted voice.

斯内普在霍格沃茨特快列车的过道里匆匆往前走，列车哐当哐当地在乡野间穿行。他已经换上了校袍，这大概是他第一次有机会脱掉那身难看的麻瓜衣服。终于，他在一间包厢外停住脚步，包厢里一群吵吵闹闹的男孩正在聊天。莉莉蜷身坐在窗边角落里的一个座位上，脸贴着玻璃窗。

“Why not?”

斯内普拉开包厢的门，坐在了莉莉对面。莉莉看了他一眼，又回过头望着窗外。她一直在哭。

“Tuney h-hates me. Because we saw that letter from Dumbledore.”

“我不想跟你说话。”她声音哽咽地说。

“So what?”

“为什么？”

She threw him a look of deep dislike.

“佩妮恨——恨我，因为我们看了邓布利多的那封信。”

“So she’s my sister!”

“那又怎么样？”

“She’s only a —” He caught himself quickly; Lily, too busy trying to wipe her eyes without being noticed, did not hear him.

她非常嫌恶地白了他一眼。

“But we’re going!” he said, unable to suppress the exhilaration in his voice. “This is it! We’re off to Hogwarts!”

“她是我姐姐！”

She nodded, mopping her eyes, but in spite of herself, she half smiled.

“她不过是个——”他赶紧闭了嘴。莉莉只顾忙着偷偷擦眼泪，没有听见他的话。

“You’d better be in Slytherin,” said Snape, encouraged that she had brightened a little.

“可是我们出发了！”他说，声音里带着无法抑制的喜悦，“没错！我们出发去霍格沃茨了！”

“Slytherin?”

莉莉点点头，擦擦眼睛，忍不住露出了一丝笑容。

One of the boys sharing the compartment, who had shown no interest at all in Lily or Snape until that point, looked around at the word, and Harry, whose attention had been focused entirely on the two beside the window, saw his father: slight, black-haired like Snape, but with that indefinable air of having been well-cared-for, even adored, that Snape so conspicuously lacked.

“你最好进斯莱特林。”斯内普说道，看到莉莉高兴了一点，他觉得很受鼓舞。

“Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I’d leave, wouldn’t you?” James asked the boy lounging on the seats opposite him, and with a jolt, Harry realized that it was Sirius. Sirius did not smile.

“斯莱特林？”

“My whole family have been in Slytherin,” he said.

坐在包厢里的一个男孩听到这个词转过头来。他本来对莉莉和斯内普没有表示出丝毫兴趣。哈利刚才把注意力全集中在窗边的两个人身上，此刻才看见了自己的父亲：他像斯内普一样身材瘦弱，头发乌黑，但一看就知道从小备受呵护，甚至很受宠爱，这显然是斯内普极度缺乏的。

“Blimey,” said James, “and I thought you seemed all right!”

“谁想去斯莱特林？我才不愿待在那儿呢，你呢？”詹姆问悠闲地坐在对面座位上的男孩。哈利心头一跳，认出那是小天狼星。小天狼星没有笑。

Sirius grinned.

“我们全家都是斯莱特林的。”他说。

“Maybe I’ll break the tradition. Where are you heading, if you’ve got the choice?”

“天哪，”詹姆说，“我还觉得你挺好的呢！”

James lifted an invisible sword.

小天狼星咧嘴笑了笑。

“ ‘Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart!’ Like my dad.”

“说不定我会打破传统。如果让你选择，你想去哪儿？”

Snape made a small, disparaging noise. James turned on him.

詹姆举起一把无形的宝剑。

“Got a problem with that?”

“‘格兰芬多，那里有埋藏在心底的勇敢！’像我爸爸一样。”

“No,” said Snape, though his slight sneer said otherwise. “If you’d rather be brawny than brainy —”

斯内普轻蔑地哼了一声，詹姆转头看着他。

“Where’re you hoping to go, seeing as you’re neither?” interjected Sirius.

“怎么，你有意见？”

James roared with laughter. Lily sat up, rather flushed, and looked from James to Sirius in dislike.

“没有，”斯内普说，但他傲慢的饥笑却表露了相反的意思，“如果你情愿肌肉发达而不是头脑发达——”

“Come on, Severus, let’s find another compartment.”

“那么你希望去哪儿？看样子你两样都不发达。”小天狼星突然插嘴道。

“Oooooo . . .”

詹姆大声笑了起来。莉莉挺直身子，绯红了脸，厌恶地看看詹姆，又看看小天狼星。

James and Sirius imitated her lofty voice; James tried to trip Snape as he passed.

“走吧，西弗勒斯，我们另外找一间包厢。”

“See ya, Snivellus!” a voice called, as the compartment door slammed. . . .

“哦哦哦哦……”

And the scene dissolved once more. . . .

詹姆和小天狼星模仿着莉莉高傲的声音，斯内普走过时詹姆还伸腿绊了他一下。

Harry was standing right behind Snape as they faced the candlelit House tables, lined with rapt faces. Then Professor McGonagall said, “Evans, Lily!”

“回见，鼻涕精！”一个声音喊道，包厢的门重重地关上了……

He watched his mother walk forward on trembling legs and sit down upon the rickety stool. Professor McGonagall dropped the Sorting Hat onto her head, and barely a second after it had touched the dark red hair, the hat cried, “Gryffindor!”

场景再次消失……

Harry heard Snape let out a tiny groan. Lily took off the hat, handed it back to Professor McGonagall, then hurried toward the cheering Gryffindors, but as she went she glanced back at Snape, and there was a sad little smile on her face. Harry saw Sirius move up the bench to make room for her. She took one look at him, seemed to recognize him from the train, folded her arms, and firmly turned her back on him.

哈利站在斯内普身后，面对着几张烛光映照的学院长桌，桌旁是一张张兴奋的面孔。这时，麦格教授说道：“莉莉·伊万斯！”

The roll call continued. Harry watched Lupin, Pettigrew, and his father join Lily and Sirius at the Gryffindor table. At last, when only a dozen students remained to be sorted, Professor McGonagall called Snape.

他注视着自己的母亲迈着颤抖的双腿走上前去，在摇摇晃晃的凳子上坐下。麦格教授把分院帽罩在她脑袋上，帽子接触到她深红色的头发还不到一秒钟，就喊道：“格兰芬多！”

Harry walked with him to the stool, watched him place the hat upon his head. “Slytherin!” cried the Sorting Hat.

哈利听见斯内普发出一声轻轻的叹息。莉莉脱下帽子还给了麦格教授，匆匆朝热烈欢呼的格兰芬多同学们走去，但她回头看了一眼斯内普，脸上露出一丝无奈的苦笑。哈利看见小天狼星在板凳上挪了挪，给她腾出了地方。莉莉看了他一眼，似乎认出他就是火车上的那个人，立刻抱起双臂，坚定地转过身背朝着他。

And Severus Snape moved off to the other side of the Hall, away from Lily, to where the Slytherins were cheering him, to where Lucius Malfoy, a prefect badge gleaming upon his chest, patted Snape on the back as he sat down beside him. . . .

点名还在继续。哈利看到卢平、小矮星和他父亲都到了格兰芬多桌旁，跟莉莉和小天狼星坐在一起。最后，只有十几个学生还没有分院，麦格教授喊道了斯内普。

And the scene changed. . . .

哈利和他一起走到凳子旁，看着他把帽子戴在脑袋上。“斯莱特林！”分院帽喊道。

Lily and Snape were walking across the castle courtyard, evidently arguing. Harry hurried to catch up with them, to listen in. As he reached them, he realized how much taller they both were: A few years seemed to have passed since their Sorting.

西弗勒斯·斯内普走向礼堂的另一边，离莉莉越来越远。斯莱特林同学在那里朝他欢呼，卢修斯·马尔福胸前戴着闪闪发亮的级长徽章，拍了拍在他身边坐下的斯内普……

“. . . thought we were supposed to be friends?” Snape was saying. “Best friends?”

场景变换……

“We are, Sev, but I don’t like some of the people you’re hanging round with! I’m sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev, he’s creepy! D’you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?”

莉莉和斯内普走在城堡的院子里，显然是在吵架。哈利紧走几步，追上去偷听。等到他追近时，才发现他们俩都高了许多。似乎自分院之后已经过去了好几年。

Lily had reached a pillar and leaned against it, looking up into the thin, sallow face.

“……以为我们应该是朋友？”斯内普在说话，“最好的朋友？”

“That was nothing,” said Snape. “It was a laugh, that’s all —”

“是这样啊，西弗，但我不喜欢跟你一起鬼混的那几个人！对不起，可是我讨厌埃弗里和穆尔塞伯！你看出他有哪点好啊，西弗？鬼鬼祟祟的！你知道他那天想对玛丽·麦克唐纳做什么吗？”

“It was Dark Magic, and if you think that’s funny —”

莉莉走到一根柱子前靠了上去，抬头望着那张灰黄的瘦脸。

“What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?” demanded Snape. His color rose again as he said it, unable, it seemed, to hold in his resentment.

“那不算什么，”斯内普说，“开个玩笑而已，没什么——”

“What’s Potter got to do with anything?” said Lily.

“那是黑魔法，如果你觉得那很好玩——”

“They sneak out at night. There’s something weird about that Lupin. Where does he keep going?”

“可波特和他那些朋友干的勾当呢？”斯内普质问道，血又涌到脸上，他似乎无法控制怨恨的情绪。

“He’s ill,” said Lily. “They say he’s ill —”

“波特有什么勾当？”莉莉说。

“Every month at the full moon?” said Snape.

“他们晚上溜出去。那个卢平有些怪异。他总是出去，去哪儿呢？”

“I know your theory,” said Lily, and she sounded cold. “Why are you so obsessed with them anyway? Why do you care what they’re doing at night?”

“他病了，”莉莉说，“他们说他病了——”

“I’m just trying to show you they’re not as wonderful as everyone seems to think they are.”

“每个月满月的时候？”斯内普说。

The intensity of his gaze made her blush.

“我知道你的想法，”莉莉说，口气很冷，“奇怪了，你为什么对他们那么上心？你为什么关心他们在夜里做什么？”

“They don’t use Dark Magic, though.” She dropped her voice. “And you’re being really ungrateful. I heard what happened the other night. You went sneaking down that tunnel by the Whomping Willow, and James Potter saved you from whatever’s down there —”

“我只是想让你看到他们并不像大家认为的那样优秀。”

Snape’s whole face contorted and he spluttered, “Saved? Saved? You think he was playing the hero? He was saving his neck and his friends’ too! You’re not going to — I won’t let you —”

在他专注的凝视下，她的脸红了。

“Let me? Let me?”

“但他们没有使用黑魔法呀，”她降低了声音，“而且你真是忘恩负义。我听说了那天夜里的事情。你从打人柳下偷偷溜进了那条隧道，是詹姆·波特救了你，逃脱了那下面的——”

Lily’s bright green eyes were slits. Snape backtracked at once.

斯内普整张脸都扭曲变形了，气急败坏地说：“救我？救我？你以为他是英雄？他是为了救他自己，还有他的朋友！你可不能——我不让你——”

“I didn’t mean — I just don’t want to see you made a fool of — He fancies you, James Potter fancies you!” The words seemed wrenched from him against his will. “And he’s not . . . everyone thinks . . . big Quidditch hero —” Snape’s bitterness and dislike were rendering him incoherent, and Lily’s eyebrows were traveling farther and farther up her forehead.

“让我？让我？”

“I know James Potter’s an arrogant toerag,” she said, cutting across Snape. “I don’t need you to tell me that. But Mulciber’s and Avery’s idea of humor is just evil. Evil, Sev. I don’t understand how you can be friends with them.”

莉莉那双明亮的绿眼睛眯成了缝，斯内普立刻退缩了。

Harry doubted that Snape had even heard her strictures on Mulciber and Avery. The moment she had insulted James Potter, his whole body had relaxed, and as they walked away there was a new spring in Snape’s step. . . .

“我不是那个意思——我只是不想看到别人把你当傻瓜——他喜欢你，詹姆·波特喜欢你！”这句话似乎是勉强从他嘴里拽出来的，“他可不是……大家都认为……了不起的魁地奇球明星——”痛苦和反感使得斯内普语无伦次，莉莉的眉毛在额头上越扬越高。

And the scene dissolved. . . .

“我知道詹姆·波特是个自以为是的自大狂，”莉莉打断了斯内普，“这点不需要你告诉我。但穆尔塞伯和埃弗里的所谓幽默是邪恶的。邪恶的，西弗。我不明白你怎么能跟他们交朋友。”

Harry watched again as Snape left the Great Hall after sitting his O.W.L. in Defense Against the Dark Arts, watched as he wandered away from the castle and strayed inadvertently close to the place beneath the beech tree where James, Sirius, Lupin, and Pettigrew sat together. But Harry kept his distance this time, because he knew what happened after James had hoisted Severus into the air and taunted him; he knew what had been done and said, and it gave him no pleasure to hear it again. . . . He watched as Lily joined the group and went to Snape’s defense. Distantly he heard Snape shout at her in his humiliation and his fury, the unforgivable word: “Mudblood.”

哈利怀疑斯内普是否听见了她对穆尔塞伯和埃弗里的批评。莉莉指责詹姆·波特的话一出口，他整个身体就放松了。当他们转身走开时，斯内普的脚步重又变得轻快起来……

The scene changed. . . .

场景消失了……

“I’m sorry.”

哈利注视着斯内普参加完黑魔法防御术课的O．W．L．考试后离开礼堂，注视着他悠闲地走出城堡，漫无目的地逛到那棵山毛榉树附近，詹姆、小天狼星、卢平和小矮星正一起坐在树下。但哈利这次没有靠近他们，因为他知道詹姆把西弗勒斯在空中百般奚落之后发生了什么事情。他知道他们做了什么，说了什么，再听一遍不会使他快乐。他注视着，莉莉走到那伙人中间去替斯内普辩护。他远远地听见斯内普恼羞成怒地冲她喊出了那个不可原谅的词：“泥巴种。”

“I’m not interested.”

场景变换……

“I’m sorry!”

“对不起。”

“Save your breath.”

“我没兴趣。”

It was nighttime. Lily, who was wearing a dressing gown, stood with her arms folded in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, at the entrance to Gryffindor Tower.

“对不起！”

“I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here.”

“别白费口舌了。”

“I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just —”

时间是晚上，莉莉穿着晨衣，抱着双臂站在格兰芬多塔楼入口处的胖夫人肖像前面。

“Slipped out?” There was no pity in Lily’s voice. “It’s too late. I’ve made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends — you see, you don’t even deny it! You don’t even deny that’s what you’re all aiming to be! You can’t wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?”

“玛丽说你扬言要睡在这里我才出来的。”

He opened his mouth, but closed it without speaking.

“我就要睡在这里。我绝不是故意叫你泥巴种的，我只是——”

“I can’t pretend anymore. You’ve chosen your way, I’ve chosen mine.”

“只是说漏了嘴吗？”莉莉的声音里没有半点同情，“太晚了。这么多年来我一直在找借口原谅你。我的朋友都不能理解我为什么还跟你说话。你和你那些亲爱的食死徒朋友——你看，你甚至都不否认！你甚至都不否认那就是你们的目标！你迫不及待地想成为神秘人的手下，对吗？”

“No — listen, I didn’t mean —”

他的嘴巴张了张，没有说话，又闭上了。

“— to call me Mudblood? But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?”

“我不能再装下去了，你选择了你的路，我选择了我的。”

He struggled on the verge of speech, but with a contemptuous look she turned and climbed back through the portrait hole. . . .

“不——听我说，我不是故意——”

The corridor dissolved, and the scene took a little longer to reform: Harry seemed to fly through shifting shapes and colors until his surroundings solidified again and he stood on a hilltop, forlorn and cold in the darkness, the wind whistling through the branches of a few leafless trees. The adult Snape was panting, turning on the spot, his wand gripped tightly in his hand, waiting for something or for someone. . . . His fear infected Harry too, even though he knew that he could not be harmed, and he looked over his shoulder, wondering what it was that Snape was waiting for —

“——叫我泥巴种？但是你管我这类出身的人都叫泥巴种，西弗勒斯。我又有什么不同呢？”

Then a blinding, jagged jet of white light flew through the air: Harry thought of lightning, but Snape had dropped to his knees and his wand had flown out of his hand.

他挣扎着还想说点什么，但莉莉轻蔑地看了他一眼，转身从肖像洞口爬了回去……

“Don’t kill me!”

走廊消失了，这次场景变换的时间长了一些。哈利似乎飞过了许多变幻的形状和色彩，最后周围的景物才固定下来。他站在黑暗中一个荒凉、寒冷的山顶，风嗖嗖地刮过几棵没有叶子的枯树。成年的斯内普气喘吁吁地原地转过身子，手里紧紧地捏着魔杖，似乎在等什么人或者什么东西……他的恐惧也感染了哈利，虽然哈利知道自己不可能受到伤害。他纳闷斯内普在等什么呢，不禁也转过头去——

“That was not my intention.”

突然，空中闪过一道刺眼的、之字形的白光，哈利以为是闪电，但斯内普扑通跪倒在地，魔杖从手里飞了出去。

Any sound of Dumbledore Apparating had been drowned by the sound of the wind in the branches. He stood before Snape with his robes whipping around him, and his face was illuminated from below in the light cast by his wand.

“别杀我！”

“Well, Severus? What message does Lord Voldemort have for me?”

“那不是我的意图。”

“No — no message — I’m here on my own account!”

风在树枝间呜呜作响，淹没了邓布利多刚才幻影显形的声音。他站在斯内普的面前，长袍在风里飘摆，魔杖的光从下面照着他的脸。

Snape was wringing his hands: He looked a little mad, with his straggling black hair flying around him.

“怎么样，西弗勒斯？伏地魔大人有什么口信给我？”

“I — I come with a warning — no, a request — please —”

“没有——没有口信——我是为自己来的！”

Dumbledore flicked his wand. Though leaves and branches still flew through the night air around them, silence fell on the spot where he and Snape faced each other.

斯内普绞着双手，看上去有点心神错乱，乌黑纷乱的头发在脑袋周围飘舞。

“What request could a Death Eater make of me?”

“我——我带来了一个警报——不，一个请求——求求您——”

“The — the prophecy . . . the prediction . . . Trelawney . . .”

邓布利多一挥魔杖。虽然周围的枝叶仍在晚风里飞舞，但在他和斯内普面对面站立的地方，却是一片寂静。

“Ah, yes,” said Dumbledore. “How much did you relay to Lord Voldemort?”

“一个食死徒能对我有何请求？”

“Everything — everything I heard!” said Snape. “That is why — it is for that reason — he thinks it means Lily Evans!”

“那个——那个预言……那个预言……特里劳妮……”

“The prophecy did not refer to a woman,” said Dumbledore. “It spoke of a boy born at the end of July —”

“啊，是了，”邓布利多说，“你向伏地魔传达了多少？”

“You know what I mean! He thinks it means her son, he is going to hunt her down — kill them all —”

“一切——我听到的一切！”斯内普说，“所以——正因为那个——他认为指的是莉莉·伊万斯！”

“If she means so much to you,” said Dumbledore, “surely Lord Voldemort will spare her? Could you not ask for mercy for the mother, in exchange for the son?”

“预言没说是女人，”邓布利多说，“说的是一个七月底出生的男孩——”

“I have — I have asked him —”

“您明白我的意思！他认为指的是莉莉的儿子，他要追到莉莉——把他们全部杀掉——”

“You disgust me,” said Dumbledore, and Harry had never heard so much contempt in his voice. Snape seemed to shrink a little. “You do not care, then, about the deaths of her husband and child? They can die, as long as you have what you want?”

“既然莉莉对你这么重要，”邓布利多说，“伏地魔肯定会免她一死吧？你就不能求求他饶了那位母亲，拿儿子作为交换？”

Snape said nothing, but merely looked up at Dumbledore.

“我——我求过他——”

“Hide them all, then,” he croaked. “Keep her — them — safe. Please.”

“你令我厌恶。”邓布利多说，哈利从没听过邓布利多以这么轻蔑的口吻说话。斯内普似乎萎缩了一点儿。“那么，你就不关心她丈夫和孩子的死活？他们尽可以死，只要你能得到你想要的？”

“And what will you give me in return, Severus?”

斯内普什么也没说，只是抬头看着邓布利多。

“In — in return?” Snape gaped at Dumbledore, and Harry expected him to protest, but after a long moment he said, “Anything.”

“那就把他们都藏起来，”他嘶哑着声音说道，“保证她——他们的——安全。求求您。”

The hilltop faded, and Harry stood in Dumbledore’s office, and something was making a terrible sound, like a wounded animal. Snape was slumped forward in a chair and Dumbledore was standing over him, looking grim. After a moment or two, Snape raised his face, and he looked like a man who had lived a hundred years of misery since leaving the wild hilltop.

“那你给我什么作为回报呢，西弗勒斯？”

“I thought . . . you were going . . . to keep her . . . safe. . . .”

“作为——回报？”斯内普张口结舌地看着邓布利多，哈利以为他会拒绝，但良久之后，他说，“什么都行。”

“She and James put their faith in the wrong person,” said Dumbledore. “Rather like you, Severus. Weren’t you hoping that Lord Voldemort would spare her?”

山顶消失了，哈利站在邓布利多的办公室里，什么东西在发出可怕的声音，像某种受伤的动物。斯内普颓然坐在椅子上，身体前倾。邓布利多站在他面前，神色严峻。过了片刻，斯内普抬起脸，自从荒野山顶的一幕之后，他仿佛度过了一百年的苦难岁月。

Snape’s breathing was shallow.

“我以为……你会……保证她的……安全……”

“Her boy survives,” said Dumbledore.

“她和詹姆错误地信任了别人，”邓布利多说，“就像你，西弗勒斯。你不是也曾指望伏地魔会饶她一命吗？”

With a tiny jerk of the head, Snape seemed to flick off an irksome fly.

斯内普的呼吸虚弱无力。

“Her son lives. He has her eyes, precisely her eyes. You remember the shape and color of Lily Evans’s eyes, I am sure?”

“她儿子活下来了。”邓布利多说。

“DON’T!” bellowed Snape. “Gone . . . dead . . .”

斯内普猛地晃了一下脑袋，像在赶走一只讨厌的苍蝇。

“Is this remorse, Severus?”

“她儿子还活着，眼睛和他妈妈的一样，一模一样。我想，你肯定记得莉莉·伊万斯的眼睛，它的形状和颜色，对吗？”

“I wish . . . I wish I were dead. . . .”

“不要！”斯内普吼道，“没了……死了……”

“And what use would that be to anyone?” said Dumbledore coldly. “If you loved Lily Evans, if you truly loved her, then your way forward is clear.”

“这是悔恨吗，西弗勒斯？”

Snape seemed to peer through a haze of pain, and Dumbledore’s words appeared to take a long time to reach him.

“我希望……我希望死的是我……”

“What — what do you mean?”

“那对别人有什么用呢？”邓布利多冷冷地说，“如果你爱莉莉·伊万斯，如果你真心地爱她，那你面前的道路很清楚。”

“You know how and why she died. Make sure it was not in vain. Help me protect Lily’s son.”

斯内普眼前似乎隔着一层痛苦的迷雾，邓布利多的话仿佛过了很长时间才传到他的耳朵里。

“He does not need protection. The Dark Lord has gone —”

“您——您说什么？”

“The Dark Lord will return, and Harry Potter will be in terrible danger when he does.”

“你知道她是怎么死的，为什么死的。别让她白白牺牲。帮助我保护莉莉的儿子。”

There was a long pause, and slowly Snape regained control of himself, mastered his own breathing. At last he said, “Very well. Very well. But never — never tell, Dumbledore! This must be between us! Swear it! I cannot bear . . . especially Potter’s son . . . I want your word!”

“他不需要保护。黑魔王走了——”

“My word, Severus, that I shall never reveal the best of you?” Dumbledore sighed, looking down into Snape’s ferocious, anguished face. “If you insist . . .”

“黑魔王还会回来，到那时候，哈利·波特将会面临可怕的危险。”

The office dissolved but re-formed instantly. Snape was pacing up and down in front of Dumbledore.

静默了很久，斯内普慢慢控制住自己，呼吸自如了。最后他说道：“很好。很好。可是千万——千万别说出去，邓布利多！只能你知我知！您起誓！我受不了……特别是波特的儿子……我要您起誓！”

“— mediocre, arrogant as his father, a determined rulebreaker, delighted to find himself famous, attention-seeking and impertinent —”

“要我起誓，西弗勒斯，永远不把你最好的方面透露出去？”邓布利多低头看着斯内普那张激动而又痛苦的脸，叹息着说，“如果你坚持……”

“You see what you expect to see, Severus,” said Dumbledore, without raising his eyes from a copy of Transfiguration Today. “Other teachers report that the boy is modest, likable, and reasonably talented. Personally, I find him an engaging child.”

办公室消失了，紧接着又重新浮现。斯内普在邓布利多面前踱来踱去。

Dumbledore turned a page, and said, without looking up, “Keep an eye on Quirrell, won’t you?”

“——跟他父亲一样平庸、傲慢，专爱违反纪律，喜欢出风头，吸引别人注意，放肆无礼——”

A whirl of color, and now everything darkened, and Snape and Dumbledore stood a little apart in the entrance hall, while the last stragglers from the Yule Ball passed them on their way to bed.

“你看到的是你预想会看到的东西，西弗勒斯，”邓布利多在看一本《今日变形术》，头也不抬地说，“别的老师都说那男孩谦虚、随和，天资也不错。我个人也发现他是个讨人喜欢的孩子。”

“Well?” murmured Dumbledore.

邓布利多翻过一页，仍然头也不抬地说：“注意奇洛，好吗？”

“Karkaroff ’s Mark is becoming darker too. He is panicking, he fears retribution; you know how much help he gave the Ministry after the Dark Lord fell.” Snape looked sideways at Dumbledore’s crooked-nosed profile. “Karkaroff intends to flee if the Mark burns.”

色彩旋转，周围的一切都变得昏暗了，斯内普和邓布利多隔开一点站在门厅里。圣诞舞会上最后一批人从他们身边走过，回去睡觉了。

“Does he?” said Dumbledore softly, as Fleur Delacour and Roger Davies came giggling in from the grounds. “And are you tempted to join him?”

“怎么样？”邓布利多轻声问。

“No,” said Snape, his black eyes on Fleur’s and Roger’s retreating figures. “I am not such a coward.”

“卡卡洛夫的标记也变黑了。他很紧张，担心会受到惩罚。你知道黑魔王倒台后他给了魔法部很多帮助。”斯内普侧眼看着邓布利多那长着弯鼻子的面影，“卡卡洛夫打算，如果标记灼痛起来，他就逃跑。”

“No,” agreed Dumbledore. “You are a braver man by far than Igor Karkaroff. You know, I sometimes think we Sort too soon. . . .”

“是吗？”邓布利多轻声说，这时芙蓉·德拉库尔和罗杰·戴维斯咯咯地笑着从操场进来了，“你也很想跟他一起去？”

He walked away, leaving Snape looking stricken. . . .

“不，”斯内普说，他的黑眼睛盯着芙蓉和罗杰远去的背影，“我不是那样的胆小鬼。”

And now Harry stood in the headmaster’s office yet again. It was nighttime, and Dumbledore sagged sideways in the thronelike chair behind the desk, apparently semiconscious. His right hand dangled over the side, blackened and burned. Snape was muttering incantations, pointing his wand at the wrist of the hand, while with his left hand he tipped a goblet full of thick golden potion down Dumbledore’s throat. After a moment or two, Dumbledore’s eyelids fluttered and opened.

“对，”邓布利多赞同道，“到目前为止，你比伊戈尔·卡卡洛夫要勇敢得多。知道吗，我有时觉得我们的分类太草率了……”

“Why,” said Snape, without preamble, “why did you put on that ring? It carries a curse, surely you realized that. Why even touch it?”

他走开了，斯内普兀自垂头丧气……

Marvolo Gaunt’s ring lay on the desk before Dumbledore. It was cracked; the sword of Gryffindor lay beside it.

这一次，哈利还是站在校长办公室里。时间是晚上，邓布利多无力地歪在桌后宝座般的椅子上，看上去神志不清。他的右手耷拉着，被烧焦了，黑乎乎的。斯内普低声念着咒语，将魔杖对准了那只手腕，左手把一杯浓浓的金色药液灌进了邓布利多的嘴里。过了片刻，邓布利多的眼皮抖动了几下，睁开了。

Dumbledore grimaced.

“你为什么，”斯内普劈头就问道，“为什么要戴上那枚戒指？它上面有魔咒，你肯定知道。为什么还要碰它？”

“I . . . was a fool. Sorely tempted . . .”

马沃罗·冈特的戒指放在邓布利多面前的桌子上，已经破裂，旁边是格兰芬多的宝剑。

“Tempted by what?”

邓布利多苦笑了一下。

Dumbledore did not answer.

“我……我做了傻事。诱惑太大了……”

“It is a miracle you managed to return here!” Snape sounded furious. “That ring carried a curse of extraordinary power, to contain it is all we can hope for; I have trapped the curse in one hand for the time being —”

“什么诱惑？”

Dumbledore raised his blackened, useless hand, and examined it with the expression of one being shown an interesting curio.

邓布利多没有回答。

“You have done very well, Severus. How long do you think I have?”

“你能够回到这里已是个奇迹！”斯内普怒气冲冲地说，“那枚戒指上有特别强大的魔咒，我们最多能希望把它遏制住。我已经把魔咒暂时囚禁在一只手里——”

Dumbledore’s tone was conversational; he might have been asking for a weather forecast. Snape hesitated, and then said, “I cannot tell. Maybe a year. There is no halting such a spell forever. It will spread eventually, it is the sort of curse that strengthens over time.”

邓布利多举起那只焦黑、无用的手，仔细端详着，就像面对着一个非常有趣的古董。

Dumbledore smiled. The news that he had less than a year to live seemed a matter of little or no concern to him.

“你干得很出色，西弗勒斯。你认为我还有多少时间？”

“I am fortunate, extremely fortunate, that I have you, Severus.”

邓布利多的语气轻松随意，如同在询问天气预报。斯内普迟疑了一下，说：“我说不好，大概一年。没有办法永远遏制这样的魔咒。它最终总会扩散，这种魔咒会随着时间的推移不断加强。”

“If you had only summoned me a little earlier, I might have been able to do more, buy you more time!” said Snape furiously. He looked down at the broken ring and the sword. “Did you think that breaking the ring would break the curse?”

邓布利多露出了微笑。他只剩下不到一年的时间了，这消息对他来说似乎无足轻重。

“Something like that . . . I was delirious, no doubt. . . .” said Dumbledore. With an effort he straightened himself in his chair. “Well, really, this makes matters much more straightforward.”

“我很幸运，非常幸运，有你在我身边，西弗勒斯。”

Snape looked utterly perplexed. Dumbledore smiled.

“如果你早点把我叫来，我或许能多采取些措施，为你争取更多的时间！”斯内普恼怒地说，他低头看着破碎的戒指和那把宝剑，“你以为摧毁戒指就能破除魔咒？”

“I refer to the plan Lord Voldemort is revolving around me. His plan to have the poor Malfoy boy murder me.”

“差不多吧……我肯定是昏了头了……”邓布利多说，他吃力地在椅子上坐直身子，“也好，这样就使事情变得更简单了。”

Snape sat down in the chair Harry had so often occupied, across the desk from Dumbledore. Harry could tell that he wanted to say more on the subject of Dumbledore’s cursed hand, but the other held it up in polite refusal to discuss the matter further. Scowling, Snape said, “The Dark Lord does not expect Draco to succeed. This is merely punishment for Lucius’s recent failures. Slow torture for Draco’s parents, while they watch him fail and pay the price.”

斯内普似乎完全被弄糊涂了。邓布利多笑了笑。

“In short, the boy has had a death sentence pronounced upon him as surely as I have,” said Dumbledore. “Now, I should have thought the natural successor to the job, once Draco fails, is yourself?”

“我指的是伏地魔围绕我制定的计划。他计划马尔福家那个可怜的男孩杀死我。”

There was a short pause.

斯内普在哈利经常坐的椅子上坐了下来，隔着桌子面对着邓布利多。哈利看出他还想再谈谈邓布利多那只被魔咒伤害的手，但对方举起焦手，委婉地表示不愿意继续谈论这个话题。斯内普皱着眉头说：“黑魔王没指望德拉科能够得手。这只是为了惩罚卢修斯最近的失败。让德拉科的父母眼看着儿子失手，然后付出代价，这对他们来说是钝刀子割肉。”

“That, I think, is the Dark Lord’s plan.”

“总之，这男孩像我一样被明确地判了死刑。”邓布利多说，“我认为，一旦德拉科失手，接替这项工作的自然是你啰？”

“Lord Voldemort foresees a moment in the near future when he will not need a spy at Hogwarts?”

短暂的沉默。

“He believes the school will soon be in his grasp, yes.”

“我想，黑魔王是这么设计的。”

“And if it does fall into his grasp,” said Dumbledore, almost, it seemed, as an aside, “I have your word that you will do all in your power to protect the students of Hogwarts?”

“伏地魔是否预见在不久的将来，他在霍格沃茨不再需要密探？”

Snape gave a stiff nod.

“他相信学校很快就会被他控制，是的。”

“Good. Now then. Your first priority will be to discover what Draco is up to. A frightened teenage boy is a danger to others as well as to himself. Offer him help and guidance, he ought to accept, he likes you —”

“如果学校真的落到他的手里，”邓布利多说，好像是临时想到插了一句，“我要你起誓你会尽全部的力量保护霍格沃茨的学生，行吗？”

“— much less since his father has lost favor. Draco blames me, he thinks I have usurped Lucius’s position.”

斯内普僵硬地点了点头。

“All the same, try. I am concerned less for myself than for accidental victims of whatever schemes might occur to the boy. Ultimately, of course, there is only one thing to be done if we are to save him from Lord Voldemort’s wrath.”

“很好。那么，你首先需要弄清德拉科打算干什么。一个惊慌失措的少年不仅对他自己危险，对别人也很危险。向他提供帮助和指导，他应该会接受，他喜欢你——”

Snape raised his eyebrows and his tone was sardonic as he asked, “Are you intending to let him kill you?”

“——他父亲失宠之后，他就不那么喜欢我了。德拉科怨我，认为我夺走了卢修斯的位置。”

“Certainly not. You must kill me.”

“没关系，试试吧。比起我自己来，我更关心的是那个男孩任何行动计划的意外牺牲品。当然啦，如果要把他从伏地魔的暴怒中解救出来，最终只有一个办法。”

There was a long silence, broken only by an odd clicking noise. Fawkes the phoenix was gnawing a bit of cuttlebone.

斯内普扬起眉毛，用讽刺的口吻问道：“你打算让他把你杀死？”

“Would you like me to do it now?” asked Snape, his voice heavy with irony. “Or would you like a few moments to compose an epitaph?”

“当然不是。必须由你杀死我。”

“Oh, not quite yet,” said Dumbledore, smiling. “I daresay the moment will present itself in due course. Given what has happened tonight,” he indicated his withered hand, “we can be sure that it will happen within a year.”

长久的沉默，屋里只有一种奇怪的咔啦啦的声音。凤凰福克斯在啃一小块墨鱼骨头。

“If you don’t mind dying,” said Snape roughly, “why not let Draco do it?”

“你希望我现在就动手吗？”斯内普问，语气里透着浓浓的讽刺，“还是你需要一点时间构思一个墓碑？”

“That boy’s soul is not yet so damaged,” said Dumbledore. “I would not have it ripped apart on my account.”

“哦，暂时还不用，”邓布利多微笑着说，“我想，那一刻该来的时候总会来的。从今晚的事情来看，”他指指自己焦枯的手，“我们可以肯定它将在一年之内发生。”

“And my soul, Dumbledore? Mine?”

“既然你不在乎死，”斯内普粗暴地说，“为什么不让德拉科得手呢？”

“You alone know whether it will harm your soul to help an old man avoid pain and humiliation,” said Dumbledore. “I ask this one great favor of you, Severus, because death is coming for me as surely as the Chudley Cannons will finish bottom of this year’s league. I confess I should prefer a quick, painless exit to the protracted and messy affair it will be if, for instance, Greyback is involved — I hear Voldemort has recruited him? Or dear Bellatrix, who likes to play with her food before she eats it.”

“那个男孩的灵魂还没被完全糟蹋，”邓布利多说，“我不愿意因为我的缘故把它弄得四分五裂。”

His tone was light, but his blue eyes pierced Snape as they had frequently pierced Harry, as though the soul they discussed was visible to him. At last Snape gave another curt nod.

“那么我的灵魂呢，邓布利多？我的呢？”

Dumbledore seemed satisfied.

“只有你知道帮助一个老人免于痛苦和耻辱不会伤害你的灵魂，”邓布利多说，“西弗勒斯，我请求你为我完成这件大事，因为死亡对于我来说是铁板钉钉的事，就像查德理火炮队将在今年的联赛中垫底一样。说句实话，我倒愿意没有痛苦地迅速结束生命，而不愿意拖拖拉拉，死得很狼狈，比如，把格雷伯克牵扯进来——我听说伏地魔把他也招进去了？或者落到亲爱的贝拉特里克斯手里，她喜欢把食物玩够了再吃？”

“Thank you, Severus . . .”

他的语气很轻松，但那双蓝眼睛却犀利地望着斯内普，就像从前望着哈利一样，似乎能真切地看见他们所谈论的灵魂。最后，斯内普轻轻地点了点头。

The office disappeared, and now Snape and Dumbledore were strolling together in the deserted castle grounds by twilight.

邓布利多好像满意了。

“What are you doing with Potter, all these evenings you are closeted together?” Snape asked abruptly.

“谢谢你，西弗勒斯……”

Dumbledore looked weary.

办公室消失了，暮色中，斯内普和邓布利多一起在冷冷清清的城堡操场上漫步。

“Why? You aren’t trying to give him more detentions, Severus? The boy will soon have spent more time in detention than out.”

“这些晚上你和波特两人关禁闭吧，西弗勒斯？过不了多久，这男孩关禁闭的时间会比他自由的时间还多。”

“He is his father over again —”

“他简直是他父亲的翻版——”

“In looks, perhaps, but his deepest nature is much more like his mother’s. I spend time with Harry because I have things to discuss with him, information I must give him before it is too late.”

“相貌上也许是这样，但他骨子里更像他的母亲。我和哈利待在一起，是因为我有事情要跟他商量，我必须给他一些信息，不然就来不及了。”

“Information,” repeated Snape. “You trust him . . . you do not trust me.”

“信息，”斯内普说，“你信任他……却不信任我。”

“It is not a question of trust. I have, as we both know, limited time. It is essential that I give the boy enough information for him to do what he needs to do.”

“这不是信任不信任的问题。你我都知道，我的时间有限。我必须给那男孩足够的信息让他去完成需要完成的事情。”

“And why may I not have the same information?”

“那为什么我不能得到同样的信息？”

“I prefer not to put all of my secrets in one basket, particularly not a basket that spends so much time dangling on the arm of Lord Voldemort.”

“我不想把我所有的秘密都装在一个篮子里，特别是一个许多时间都挂在伏地魔胳膊上的篮子。”

“Which I do on your orders!”

“我是按你的吩咐做的！”

“And you do it extremely well. Do not think that I underestimate the constant danger in which you place yourself, Severus. To give Voldemort what appears to be valuable information while withholding the essentials is a job I would entrust to nobody but you.”

“你做得非常出色。不要以为我低估了你时时所处的危险，西弗勒斯。只把看似有价值的情报告诉伏地魔，而把最重要的信息留在心底，这项工作我只能交给你。”

“Yet you confide much more in a boy who is incapable of Occlumency, whose magic is mediocre, and who has a direct connection into the Dark Lord’s mind!”

“可是你却更信赖一个连大脑封闭术都不会的小男孩，他的魔法很平庸，而且可以直接连接黑魔王的思想！”

“Voldemort fears that connection,” said Dumbledore. “Not so long ago he had one small taste of what truly sharing Harry’s mind means to him. It was pain such as he has never experienced. He will not try to possess Harry again, I am sure of it. Not in that way.”

“伏地魔害怕那种连接，”邓布利多说，“不久以前，他稍稍领略了一番分享哈利的思想对他来说意味着什么。他从未体验过那样的痛苦。他再也不会试图控制哈利了，我可以肯定，至少不是用那种方式。”

“I don’t understand.”

“我不明白。”

“Lord Voldemort’s soul, maimed as it is, cannot bear close contact with a soul like Harry’s. Like a tongue on frozen steel, like flesh in flame —”

“伏地魔的灵魂如此残缺不全，它受不了接近哈利那样的灵魂，就像舌头粘在冰冻的钢上，皮肉接触火焰——”

“Souls? We were talking of minds!”

“灵魂？我们谈的是思想！”

“In the case of Harry and Lord Voldemort, to speak of one is to speak of the other.”

“在哈利和伏地魔的问题上，这两者是一回事。”

Dumbledore glanced around to make sure that they were alone. They were close by the Forbidden Forest now, but there was no sign of anyone near them.

邓布利多环顾四周，确保除了他俩之外没有别人。他们现在到了禁林附近，但周围没有一个人影。

“After you have killed me, Severus —”

“西弗勒斯，在你杀死我之后——”

“You refuse to tell me everything, yet you expect that small service of me!” snarled Snape, and real anger flared in the thin face now. “You take a great deal for granted, Dumbledore! Perhaps I have changed my mind!”

“你什么都不肯告诉我，却还指望我帮你那个小忙！”斯内普低吼道。瘦瘦的脸上闪着真正的怒气，“你觉得许多事情都理所当然，邓布利多！说不定我改变主意了呢！”

“You gave me your word, Severus. And while we are talking about services you owe me, I thought you agreed to keep a close eye on our young Slytherin friend?”

“你发过誓的，西弗勒斯。说到你为我效力的事，我记得你答应过要密切关注我们那位年轻的斯莱特林朋友，对吗？”

Snape looked angry, mutinous. Dumbledore sighed.

斯内普显得恼怒而不服气。邓布利多叹息了一声。

“Come to my office tonight, Severus, at eleven, and you shall not complain that I have no confidence in you. . . .”

“今晚十一点到我办公室来，西弗勒斯，你就不会抱怨我不信任你了……”

They were back in Dumbledore’s office, the windows dark, and Fawkes sat silent as Snape sat quite still, as Dumbledore walked around him, talking.

他们回到邓布利多的办公室，窗外漆黑一片，福克斯安安静静地待着，斯内普坐在那里一动不动，邓布利多一边说话，一边在他周围走来走去。

“Harry must not know, not until the last moment, not until it is necessary, otherwise how could he have the strength to do what must be done?”

“不到最后关头，不到绝对必要的时候，千万不能让哈利知道，不然他怎么有力量去做他必须要做的事情呢？”

“But what must he do?”

“他必须要做什么？”

“That is between Harry and me. Now listen closely, Severus. There will come a time — after my death — do not argue, do not interrupt! There will come a time when Lord Voldemort will seem to fear for the life of his snake.”

“那是哈利和我之间的事。现在，西弗勒斯，请你听仔细了。到了某个时候——在我死后——不要反驳，不要插嘴！到了某个时候，伏地魔似乎会为他那条大蛇的生命担心。”

“For Nagini?” Snape looked astonished.

“为纳吉尼担心？”斯内普显得很惊愕。

“Precisely. If there comes a time when Lord Voldemort stops sending that snake forth to do his bidding, but keeps it safe beside him under magical protection, then, I think, it will be safe to tell Harry.”

“不错。如果到了某个时候，伏地魔不再派那条大蛇去执行命令，而是让它守在身边，用魔法把它保护起来，到了那时，我想就可以告诉哈利了。”

“Tell him what?”

“告诉他什么？”

Dumbledore took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

邓布利多深深吸了口气，闭上了眼睛。

“Tell him that on the night Lord Voldemort tried to kill him, when Lily cast her own life between them as a shield, the Killing Curse rebounded upon Lord Voldemort, and a fragment of Voldemort’s soul was blasted apart from the whole, and latched itself onto the only living soul left in that collapsing building. Part of Lord Voldemort lives inside Harry, and it is that which gives him the power of speech with snakes, and a connection with Lord Voldemort’s mind that he has never understood. And while that fragment of soul, unmissed by Voldemort, remains attached to and protected by Harry, Lord Voldemort cannot die.”

“告诉他，在伏地魔试图杀死他的那天夜里，当莉莉用自己的生命挡在他们之间时，那个杀戮咒反弹到伏地魔身上，伏地魔灵魂的一个碎片被炸飞了，附着在坍塌的房子里惟一活着的灵魂上。伏地魔的一部分活在哈利体内，使哈利有了与蛇对话的能力，并可以连接伏地魔的思想，这一直令他百思不得其解。只要那个没被伏地魔发现的灵魂碎片还依附在哈利身上，受到哈利的保护，伏地魔就不可能死。”

Harry seemed to be watching the two men from one end of a long tunnel, they were so far away from him, their voices echoing strangely in his ears.

哈利似乎是在一条长长隧道的尽头注视着邓布利多和斯内普，他们离他那么遥远，他们的说话声在他耳朵里发出奇怪的回音。

“So the boy . . . the boy must die?” asked Snape quite calmly.

“那么那男孩……那男孩必须死去？”斯内普很平静地问。

“And Voldemort himself must do it, Severus. That is essential.”

“而且必须由伏地魔亲自动手，西弗勒斯。那是非常重要的。”

Another long silence. Then Snape said, “I thought . . . all these years . . . that we were protecting him for her. For Lily.”

又是长时间的沉默。然后斯内普说：“我还以为……这么多年来……我还以为我们是在保护他，为了她，为了莉莉。”

“We have protected him because it has been essential to teach him, to raise him, to let him try his strength,” said Dumbledore, his eyes still tight shut. “Meanwhile, the connection between them grows ever stronger, a parasitic growth: Sometimes I have thought he suspects it himself. If I know him, he will have arranged matters so that when he does set out to meet his death, it will truly mean the end of Voldemort.”

“我们保护他，是因为必须调教他，培养他，让他磨炼自己的能力，”邓布利多说，仍然紧闭着眼睛，“与此同时，他们之间的连接也变得越来越强，像一种寄生的生命。有时我觉得他好像自己也有所察觉。如果我真的了解他，我认为他会把一切安排妥当，这样当他毅然赴死时，就意味着伏地魔的真正完结。”

Dumbledore opened his eyes. Snape looked horrified.

邓布利多睁开了眼睛，斯内普神色惊恐。

“You have kept him alive so that he can die at the right moment?”

“你让他活着，只是为了他能在适当的时候赴死？”

“Don’t be shocked, Severus. How many men and women have you watched die?”

“别大惊失色，西弗勒斯。你目睹了多少男男女女的死？”

“Lately, only those whom I could not save,” said Snape. He stood up. “You have used me.”

“最近，只有那些我无力相救的人。”斯内普说，然后他站了起来，“你利用了我。”

“Meaning?”

“什么意思？”

“I have spied for you and lied for you, put myself in mortal danger for you. Everything was supposed to be to keep Lily Potter’s son safe. Now you tell me you have been raising him like a pig for slaughter —”

“我为你做密探，为你编造谎言，为你冒着致命的危险。这一切据说都是为了保证莉莉·波特儿子的安全。现在你却告诉我，你养着他就像养着一头待杀的猪——”

“But this is touching, Severus,” said Dumbledore seriously. “Have you grown to care for the boy, after all?”

“多么感人哪，西弗勒斯，”邓布利多严肃地说，“难道你真的开始喜欢那个男孩了？”

“For him?” shouted Snape. “Expecto Patronum!”

“喜欢他？”斯内普叫了起来，“呼神护卫！”

From the tip of his wand burst the silver doe: She landed on the office floor, bounded once across the office, and soared out of the window. Dumbledore watched her fly away, and as her silvery glow faded he turned back to Snape, and his eyes were full of tears.

他的杖尖蹦出了那头银色的牝鹿。它落在地板上，轻轻一跃就到了办公室那头，飞出了窗外。邓布利多注视着它远去，注视着它的银光消失，然后转脸望着斯内普，他的眼里已盈满泪水。

“After all this time?”

“这么长时间了还是这样？”

“Always,” said Snape.

“一直是这样。”斯内普说。

And the scene shifted. Now, Harry saw Snape talking to the portrait of Dumbledore behind his desk.

场景转换。现在，哈利看见斯内普在跟办公室后的邓布利多肖像说话。

“You will have to give Voldemort the correct date of Harry’s departure from his aunt and uncle’s,” said Dumbledore. “Not to do so will raise suspicion, when Voldemort believes you so well informed. However, you must plant the idea of decoys; that, I think, ought to ensure Harry’s safety. Try Confunding Mundungus Fletcher. And Severus, if you are forced to take part in the chase, be sure to act your part convincingly. . . . I am counting upon you to remain in Lord Voldemort’s good books as long as possible, or Hogwarts will be left to the mercy of the Carrows. . . .”

“你必须把哈利离开他姨妈姨父家的确切日期告诉伏地魔，”邓布利多说，“伏地魔认为你消息非常灵通，你不这么做会引起怀疑的。不过，你必须把利用替身的主意灌输给别人——我想那样应该能够保证哈利的安全。试着对蒙顿格斯·弗莱奇用混淆咒。还有，西弗勒斯，如果你不得不参加追逐，一定要表现得令人信服……我指望你继续取得伏地魔的信任，时间越长越好，不然，霍格沃茨就会任由卡罗兄妹摆布……”

Now Snape was head to head with Mundungus in an unfamiliar tavern, Mundungus’s face looking curiously blank, Snape frowning in concentration.

现在，斯内普正在一家陌生的酒馆里与蒙顿格斯交头接耳，蒙顿格斯满脸的茫然、迷惑，斯内普皱着眉头，全神贯注。

“You will suggest to the Order of the Phoenix,” Snape murmured, “that they use decoys. Polyjuice Potion. Identical Potters. It is the only thing that might work. You will forget that I have suggested this. You will present it as your own idea. You understand?”

“你要向凤凰社提出建议，”斯内普低声说道，“让他们使用替身。复方汤剂。几个一模一样的波特。只有这个办法才管用。你要忘记这个建议是我提的。要当成你自己的主意提出来。明白吗？”

“I understand,” murmured Mundungus, his eyes unfocused. . . .

“明白。”蒙顿格斯喃喃地说，两眼呆滞无神……

Now Harry was flying alongside Snape on a broomstick through a clear dark night: He was accompanied by other hooded Death Eaters, and ahead were Lupin and a Harry who was really George. . . . A Death Eater moved ahead of Snape and raised his wand, pointing it directly at Lupin’s back —

现在，哈利伴着骑扫帚的斯内普，在空旷的黑夜中飞行。身边还有其他戴兜帽的食死徒，前面是卢平，还有一个由乔治扮成的哈利……一个食死徒冲到斯内普前面，举起魔杖对准了卢平的后背——

“Sectumsempra!” shouted Snape.

“神锋无影！”斯内普大喊一声。

But the spell, intended for the Death Eater’s wand hand, missed and hit George instead —

魔咒本来瞄准的是食死徒拿魔杖的手，不料却击中了乔治——

And next, Snape was kneeling in Sirius’s old bedroom. Tears were dripping from the end of his hooked nose as he read the old letter from Lily. The second page carried only a few words:

接着，斯内普跪在小天狼星的旧卧室里。他读着莉莉写的那封旧信，泪水从鹰钩鼻的鼻尖流淌下来。信的第二页只有几句话：

could ever have been friends with Gellert Grindelwald. I think

会和盖勒特·格林德沃交朋友。我个人认为，她脑子有点糊涂了！

her mind’s going, personally!

无限爱意

Lots of love,

莉莉

Snape took the page bearing Lily’s signature, and her love, and tucked it inside his robes. Then he ripped in two the photograph he was also holding, so that he kept the part from which Lily laughed, throwing the portion showing James and Harry back onto the floor, under the chest of drawers. . . .

斯内普拿起这页留有莉莉签名和爱意的信纸，塞进了长袍里。然后他把手里的照片一撕两半，留下莉莉欢笑的一半，把詹姆和哈利的一半扔在地上的五斗橱下……

And now Snape stood again in the headmaster’s study as Phineas Nigellus came hurrying into his portrait.

现在，斯内普又站在校长的书房里，菲尼亚斯·奈杰勒斯匆匆闯进了自己的肖像。

“Headmaster! They are camping in the Forest of Dean! The Mudblood —”

“校长！他们在迪安森林里扎营！那个泥巴种——”

“Do not use that word!”

“不许说那个词！”

“— the Granger girl, then, mentioned the place as she opened her bag and I heard her!”

“——那个姓格兰杰的女孩打开包时说了地名，我听见了！”

“Good. Very good!” cried the portrait of Dumbledore behind the headmaster’s chair. “Now, Severus, the sword! Do not forget that it must be taken under conditions of need and valor — and he must not know that you give it! If Voldemort should read Harry’s mind and see you acting for him —”

“好，很好！”校长座椅后面的邓布利多肖像大声说，“现在，西弗勒斯，拿上那把宝剑吧！别忘了必须在有需要和有勇气的条件下才能拿到它——千万别让他知道是你拿去的！万一伏地魔读取哈利的思想，看到你在帮他——”

“I know,” said Snape curtly. He approached the portrait of Dumbledore and pulled at its side. It swung forward, revealing a hidden cavity behind it from which he took the sword of Gryffindor.

“我知道。”斯内普简单地说。他凑近了邓布利多的肖像，把它往外一拉。肖像打开了，露出藏在后面的一个洞，斯内普从里面拿出了格兰芬多的宝剑。

“And you still aren’t going to tell me why it’s so important to give Potter the sword?” said Snape as he swung a traveling cloak over his robes.

“你还是不肯告诉我为什么把宝剑交给波特这么重要，是吗？”斯内普说着把一件旅行斗篷披在长袍外面。

“No, I don’t think so,” said Dumbledore’s portrait. “He will know what to do with it. And Severus, be very careful, they may not take kindly to your appearance after George Weasley’s mishap —”

“是的，确实如此，”邓布利多肖像说道，“他会知道拿它派什么用场。西弗勒斯，千万小心，乔治·韦斯莱发生意外之后，他们对你的出现不会表示友好——”

Snape turned at the door.

斯内普在门边转过身。

“Don’t worry, Dumbledore,” he said coolly. “I have a plan. . . .”

“不用担心，邓布利多，”他冷冷地说，“我自有安排……”

And Snape left the room. Harry rose up out of the Pensieve, and moments later he lay on the carpeted floor in exactly the same room: Snape might just have closed the door.

斯内普离开了房间。哈利慢慢地从冥想盆里升了上来。片刻之后，他躺在校长办公室的地毯上，就好像斯内普刚刚把房门关上。

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